~ by Amanda Enloe ~
So 93%of the time when I do something stupid, or exercise my poor decision-making ability, I am comforted in the knowledge that I am sure that this is not the first time something like this has happened to someone. I know other people have burned dinners, tripped and fallen in public places, had a bad online dating experience, or have forgotten to put on pants when they left the house for work. But then there are the other 7% of my experiences. And in those instances, if I had to quantify the number of individuals that had done something similar, I am quite confident that I most likely would stand alone. This is one example of that other 7%.
I had become increasingly concerned over an issue I was having with my left eye. Whenever I would drive, my left eye would become very blurry and I would be unable to see out of it. But this concerning phenomenon only occurred while I was driving. It corrected itself immediately as soon as I would arrive at my destination. Perplexed about the situation, I was walking out of the gym and telling a buddy of mine about what was going on. He, too, was confused as to how this issue was only arising when I was in my vehicle. “Perhaps it’s because I’m straining my eye when I’m driving?” I began as he started walking me to my car. As I got in behind the wheel, I grabbed my newly purchased sunglasses and slid them on and continued, “I’ll call my doctor now and get in for an evaluation to see what the issue is.” I turned to my friend to say goodbye and actually witnessed his jaw hit the ground. For 10 seconds, no 20 seconds, he was keeled over laughing. After he was able to regain composure, he grabbed my sunglasses from my face and turned them towards me indicating the culprit behind my curious left eyed blindness. I had forgotten to remove the UV sticker covering the left lense of my new glasses. Mystery solved. His professional diagnosis: Amanda’s an idiot.